Dont damn me

What is the true test of love? Most of us have our own theories. Some derive it from the old, clichéd tales of romance where the two people involved claim to do anything and everything for each other, and are ready to pay the ultimate price even. Remember the tales of Romeo-Juliet, Heer-Ranjha etc; losing their sheen gradually as we evolve but nonetheless stand true for quite a few of us. Others tend to be slightly more practical and think the true test of love is when you want your guy/girl to be around and actually find them; that the two of them are ready to slog through thick and thin together. Few others think that their love is eternal when they find a person who in a short period of time is capable of reading them inside out; one who they think will make them happy, for now and ever. For them it’s a leap of faith.
I have a slightly different take on this and I am not sure how I actually hit upon this theory and how and when I actually developed and implemented it. For me, the real test is when I have this “special lady” with me which as per the common perception has this special something about her, and I have one more lady who might not be as special as the first one, nonetheless, is talented enough. The second lady need not be a total stunner, but yeah, she should know how to carry herself. And carry herself well. And the test involves pitting the two of them against each other. In simpler terms, comparing the two. Most of my ladies have told me not to compare them with anyone else, all of them claiming that they are special. Never denied that, yeah, all of you have been special in your own styles. Still…….
There have been instances where I have been completely smitten by someone, and am not able to think beyond her. I have, at times, taken the courage to take the next step forward. Sometimes met with success, met with failures quite often also. And then we have been on these dates, these coffee evenings, long walks etc. As the days pass and I start knowing the lady more and more, I start thinking that she has to be the best thing that has happened to me for quite some time. Sometimes I also ponder that this might not be the infatuation at all, this time for sure I am in love.
As ill luck could have it, only if to justify the Murphy’s Law, I happen to be in a situation where I have this special lady next to me and I also have one more lady with me. And then this whole theory of comparison comes into play. I look at this lady (can I take the liberty of calling her my lady); I look at the other lady. And snap, everything’s gone. Gone daddy gone, the love is gone. Finished. Never understood why this happens to me, but happens quite often. Was I living in a one-dimensional world where I could not think of and imagine about anyone else? Was I the proverbial frog of the pond that never saw the sea in all its vastness? Was it that she was the only lady with me that my mind actually perceived her to be special?
I don’t preach this theory of mine to anyone, and certainly don’t encourage anyone to implement this. I have an advice though. Don’t make your life spin around one single person, don’t make it one-dimensional. Things might go great for sometime, maybe for a long long time; still, it makes life a tad too monotonous.
About me, I don’t know. Maybe I am mentally sick. I actually confessed to one of my friends that I am a prime divorce candidate, because I might not be able to concentrate on someone for long. Maybe I will find that special someone someday, who will actually pass this weird test of mine. Again and again. And that day, I might actually contemplate tying the knots. But is that possible, cause I am supposed to do an arranged marriage, that’s what my culture and upbringing dictates me to do. For the time being, god forbid that it aint forever, I am a misogamist.