If Winter Comes, Can Spring Be Far Behind?

(Originally posted on Yahoo 360, Wednesday November 1, 2006 - 10:46am IST)

This fall he is set to lose all that the claimed he had. The script had been written a long time back, the recipe for disaster been brewed, the execution plan followed to the T, only the proverbial final nail in the coffin needs to be put. Skills have deserted him, lady luck never bothered about him, off late. He is going down. He liked to call himself rattlesnake, a fighter to the core. He aint that no more. He has been reduced to a pulp of blood and mud; beaten, bruised, battered.

People say he is a nice guy, he has a nice job, must be enjoying himself. Well, yes, once he used to be a nice guy, but his conscience stops himself from calling himself anything but nice now. The job is still there, for how long, he aint sure. And as far as enjoying himself is concerned, he never had that skill. He was never a leader of men, he always preferred to follow. He partied when they did, he did fun and frolic when they did, he sat idle when they thought so. Never had it in him to call the shots, carve something out for himself.

Times changed. He was thrown into the open, to make a name for himself. And he did what he knew best to do, follow. This time the guys around meant business, no more sunny days, only drab dull evenings and nights. So, he transformed himself. The adopted happy-go-lucky nature gave way to “Ohh, I am too busy right now, come back later” attitude. The one-dimensional nature of his existence killed his social roots.

He hasn’t had a decent laugh in last six months, hasn’t been a part of crowd for most part of this year. He sees people around him smiling so effortlessly, he considers them blessed. He sees brothers walking arms in arms; he sees couple strolling, blushing with the radiance of each other’s company; he sees gangs of friends having a really nice time together. And then he looks at himself, walking all alone, no one to his left or right. No one to follow him, no on he can follow. May be other people have something special about them, may be he has nothing even average about him.



He came to this city with a determination to make it big, make an identity for himself. After all, this was his first job. And don’t they say, well begun is half done. So, he started pumping those long hours, his bosses were more than happy. But what about his friends? He appeared to be too ambitious, too self-centered. Never could afford enough time for them. “Lets go to movie this Saturday.” “Sorry, can’t make it, gotta take care of some unfinished business.” “Lets go out for drink.” “Sorry mate, that aint where I want to be.” And so, he started cutting the very roots that saw him rise to prominence. His friends did care for him, but for how long. They tried their best to have him as one of them, he proved to be a self-destructive freak. And so, with passage of time, he faded out. He was there, but not exactly there. He was cut out. Aint they preach on TV, no one is bigger than the team, and no one is indispensable.

He never tried to make new friends. He always thought he is set for better things. He shrugged few ‘coz he thought they were socially unfit to be spotted with, he rejected few because he thought they lacked a requisite sense of humor. Ha-ha, just that he had been with guys who had real whacky sense for it, he perceived even he had a decent one. He was part of more than a few groups, he never committed to any. His volleyball team still has high regards for him; his basketball gang will have a tough time recalling his face, maybe even his name.

And his workplace team, they always thought he was too good to be true. Everything that goes up comes down. Some day even he will. For the time being, lets not indulge in this cloud headed guy.

So, he walks all alone, chews his dinner all alone.



He was always deemed as a good student, maybe some truth to it, maybe all hype. For a long time, he never let this to creep into his head. But for how long can you ward off the evil? Just because he knew the art of getting good scores when it mattered, just that he was the proverbial one-eyed guy in a village of blinds, he thought he was better than most of the two-eyed clan. Oh yeah, I am smart, I am intelligent; he exclaimed. Maybe he forgot the patchy record of his past, brilliant at times, shoddy often. He thought he can emulate what most other can. He preached his study was incomplete, simple grad wont fetch you anything, he said he needed a post grad. And with a good deal of hype and hoopla, he took that mission, improbable but not impossible. Constant reminders of his limitations never deterred him; failure laughing in his face never stopped him from trying. Maybe that was his strength; maybe he was living in a fool’s paradise. Time will tell, yeah time is a very good judge, and a brutal one. He might have lost the edge, maybe its curtains.



He started his career in a very impressive manner, winning accolades for achieving things in very short span of time. But how? He gave 16 when they asked for 8. For him, results always were the first priority, the method secondary. He gave results, and at a very good pace. Wait a sec. Were his solutions foolproof or were the elements bound by chewing gum, sooner or later going to lose the adhesive. No body cared; maybe this is how they work. But yeah, he rose to prominence. They lauded his skills, they appreciated his dedication. Some preached, some offered advice, others applauded.

Someone advised, “Listen kid, we all know you are special. But so were Tendulkar and Kambli, both equally gifted, both equally talented. One mad it big, the other lost his way in the woods. Stay focused.”

His boss compared him with Mahendra Dhoni. Dhoni’s stocks were rising and so were his. Both were thought to be the best thing that had happened to their respective teams in the recent past. This was about April, both doing pretty well in their fields.

Where are they now? In doldrums. Maybe, success got to their head. May my assessment about Dhoni be farce, wish the same for him too. The matter of fact, though, as it stands is that both of them don’t command the same respect from their bosses they once did.

Isn’t he still working hard? He is, but so are his distractions too. He wants to concentrate on his studies, work taking a backseat. Maybe he is trying to ride two boats, maybe his not fit for even one. The results are still there, but they don’t look as distinctive as they did. He still can deliver what some struggle to; he still is their safer bet in crucial scenarios. He is losing his edge, though.



He had a steady love life, or he thought so. He thought this girl was special. She was brilliant, she still is. She was beautiful, she still retrains her charm. But hasn’t the guy changed. Does the guy still have those features the female fell for? Maybe, maybe not. Maybe he is not indispensable anymore. Or maybe he is. Only Lord knows, he never had the ability to read a woman’s mind. She thought he was an honest guy, she felt he was innocent. Is there innocence anymore? Hasn’t the honesty dwindled? She thought he was smart. Maybe he was, maybe momentarily though. She thought he cared for her. Don’t most of guys care for their female? Affirmative sir. She thought he was different, aren’t all of us? She thought he was special. Maybe. He made her feel special, he made her feel wanted, and he made her feel exclusive. But how long they are going to hold the fort. Someone better than him might be lurking in the corner; he will never get a clue. Or aren’t all of them better than him? What is he, nothing more than a weary, drab loser? And no one cares for a loser. Maybe she still loves her, but is he lovable?

Distance heals some wounds, time most. But don’t they leave behind scars.



So, what’s your prediction? Hasn’t he already lost everything? He is finished, dumped and disposed. RIP.

Or is he? The rattlesnake will raise its ugly head again. They have a reputation not for nothing. He will rise, much like the proverbial phoenix from the ashes. Skills might have deserted him, fate might have too, but he still has hopes.

Hopes of making it big, hopes of completing his post-grad, hopes of standing tall in the crowd, hopes of surprising his lady. Some day, he will make them proud. Someday…